Celebrity fashion and beauty blunders 2009

It’s been a year full of events, celebrity tantrums and fashion and beauty disasters. We’ve had a smile, shed a tear at the number of talents we’ve lost (RIP Michael Jackson, Patrick Swayze and Brittany Murphy) and had many “what was she thinking” moments when looking at some celebs attempts at beauty and fashion.

So to end the year, we’ve put together a list of celebrity beauty and fashion blunders that have made us cringe. And also added a gallery (click on the picture below the text to begin) so you can see exactly what we’re talking about. We hope you have a merry Christmas and we’ll be back in the new year to keep you updated on all the latest fashion news.

1. Fake tan
It was only last week we bought this criminal trend to light. The war of the fake tan has been going for many years but celebs have still not learnt that looking like an orangutan on the red carpet is not a good look.

2009 Devils
Offenders include Bianca Gascoigne and Brooke Hogan who both clearly believe that this is the way to success. However we say that looking like an Oompa Lumpa will only get you a job in a chocolate factory, and even then you may have trouble convincing Cadburys that you don’t have a radioactive disease.

2009 Angel
Victoria Beckham gets our fake tan seal of approval after she realised pale is far prettier than putrid orange and threw away those tanning bottles.

2. Choosing Lipo over exercise
While we think the best way to get that perfect body is through exercise and healthy eating (with a little bit of what you fancy for good measure) some of the celebrity population don’t agree, preferring to pay for a quick fix rather than do it themselves.

2009 Devils
Earlier this year both Kerry Katona, who shrunk to a tiny size 8, and Britney Spears went under the skinny knife to perfect their bodies. However, while Britney has kept the weight off, we think Kerry had something removed from her brain (namely the nerve that stops you eating shed loads of fatty foods) and is a shining example of why exercise and healthy eating is a better option. Take those delivery menus away from her!

2009 Angels
There are many stars who go for exercise rather than the knife but our special mention goes to UK home grown Charlotte Church. The mother of two shed her baby weight and slimmed down to a size 8 with the help of a personal trainer and nutritional advice from gorgeous Rugby star hubby Gavin Henson.

3. Size denial
While many a celeb wishes they were the “Hollywood” size zero, some (shock horror) are just that tiny bit over. We won’t be mentioning any names for fear we’ll send them straight into rehab, but we can’t resist having a go at the celebs that really are in denial here, squeezing themselves into those too small jeans, which they hope will grant them automatic inclusion into that size.

2009 Devils
We’re really sorry Kerry Katona, but squeezing yourself into those very early post lipo jeans will not magically take away the pounds gained from thoseIceland microwave meal freebies and loyalty points racked up from your favourite take away menus. Buy the correct size and we guarantee the days of lying on the floor struggling to zip up those jeans will be no more. And Jordan, a small breast reduction does not mean you’ll fit into that tiny A cup corset.

4. Flashing your pants
Every girl above the age of five knows that flashing your panties (especially the big ones) is not the way to attract that boy in your reception class or, if your a celeb, public admiration. So we haven’t been particularly enamoured with the range of people who have chosen to do this during 2009.

2009 Devils
Ahh Jordan, it seems you can’t keep anything a secret and we’re not just talking about your private life with Peter Andre. We’ve seen everything from G-strings to a slightly bigger variety. Didn’t your mother ever tell you not to air your dirty laundry in public? And Michelle Heaton, we know Jordan is your best friend and idol, but just because she does it, it doesn’t mean you have to. One scantily clad fake tanned bottom is more than enough for us thank you very much.

2009 Angels
We weren’t going to have an Angels category here but then we remembered Lady Gaga, who has made the pants as outerwear fashion (unfortunately) fashionable. We think these look great on the singer when she’s performing, we also think we should give a little mention to Eva Longoria Parker who posed for the cover of Citizen K in some big, flattering panties. However, we advise the rest of you to steer clear. And guys, it’s not an excuse to go all Superman style on us either.

5. Choosing a short dress over a classy long frock
We’re big fans of the LBD and similar styles but sometimes flashing your legs can lead to a whole heap of trouble, and if you’re a celebrity who likes an odd tipple then you could end up showing off more than just your pins. Likewise an ill fitting super mini may have you pulling it down all evening, making us think that long may just cut it on the red carpet or event.

2009 Devils
We know we’ll get lynched for saying this, but the award here goes to Sarah Jessica Parker (we know, we know, and we’re sorry) who demonstrated that short can sometimes be the wrong choice. The otherwise perfect fashionista hoiked up, and pulled down her super mini pink dress at the premier of Did You Hear about The Morgans? making her look uncomfortable and giving photographers an eyeful.

2009 Angels
We couldn’t do a 2009 round up without getting the X-Factor in here somewhere, and what better way to mention it than by giving a nod to Dannii Minogue’s long and elegant long dresses. The judge won our X-factor style war by opting for a range of classy, long Grecian style dresses over Cheryl’s experimental fashions.

6. Choosing Uggs over heels
We’ve championed Uggs for a good few years, and have to admit they came in very handy in yesterday’s snow. However, our columnist Lauren disagrees, and judging by the comments we received from you, we can see they really haven’t been the style du jour for a good few years.

2009 Devils
Sorry Stacey Solomon, we love your voice however your love of Uggs has most definitely earned you the right to be here. On the bright side at least you’ve made it into some kind of countdown chart.

2009 Angel
Who better to champion those heels than Sarah Jessica Parker (have we redeemed ourselves?). The Sex and the City Starlet, who showed girls like us worldwide has hit the streets or 2009 in a range of heels that have had us stamping our feet with envy. We also think Victoria Beckham should get a mention here too. She may need surgery caused by her love of sky scraper heels, but despite this the fashion princess has continued to wear her trademark shoes opting for foot exercises to help her recover.